Tuesday, June 27, 2006
ungroundless anticipation #2.
i hate who i am now.
i hate myself for being so easily satisfied.
i hate myself for having such low expectations.
i hate myself for being so soft.
i hate myself for being moved so easily.
i hate myself for being such an emotional freak.
i wanna be as strong as he thinks i am.
i aspire to be happy in whatever i do.
so, tata.
it's so gonna be a challenge for me.
to do things that make myself happy, and at the same time, to put others before myself.
i hate myself for being so easily satisfied.
i hate myself for having such low expectations.
i hate myself for being so soft.
i hate myself for being moved so easily.
i hate myself for being such an emotional freak.
i wanna be as strong as he thinks i am.
i aspire to be happy in whatever i do.
so, tata.
it's so gonna be a challenge for me.
to do things that make myself happy, and at the same time, to put others before myself.
ungroundless anticipation.
i like the way you touch my hand.
i like the way you look into my eyes.
.
.
.
.
.
.
i'm gonna live the moment.
i like the way you look into my eyes.
.
.
.
.
.
.
i'm gonna live the moment.
Sunday, June 18, 2006
conflicted emotions.
i don't like squares.
neither do i adore triangles.
.
.
.
.
.
.
is this a trial from God that we must pass?
(sounds so cliche.)
or is this just another transition period.
i don't like you being so rational.
but, it pleases me when you still do follow your heart in the end.
i don't like the feeling of dangling in the air.
i want you to hold on to me.
and never let me go.
it scares me to know how much i'm actually afraid of losing you.
your words make me confused at times.
your actions contradict your words most of the time.
right now, i only pray for you and me to be happy.
neither do i adore triangles.
.
.
.
.
.
.
is this a trial from God that we must pass?
(sounds so cliche.)
or is this just another transition period.
i don't like you being so rational.
but, it pleases me when you still do follow your heart in the end.
i don't like the feeling of dangling in the air.
i want you to hold on to me.
and never let me go.
it scares me to know how much i'm actually afraid of losing you.
your words make me confused at times.
your actions contradict your words most of the time.
right now, i only pray for you and me to be happy.
Friday, June 09, 2006
more than words.
i think i need to stop for a moment, take a breather and think.
things are moving way too fast and i find it pretty hard to understand or even absorb the whole situation.
it has been a long time since i had such feelings.
i don't know if i should be feeling elated, or scared.
my whole mind is in a huge confusion.
i don't know what to do, what to say, what not to do or what not to say.
.
.
.
.
.
.
everything seems like a fairytale come true.
except that it's one with a little too many obstacles that need to be cleared.
and it ain't easy removing them.
in the past, i used to question myself constantly.
but right now, i think i've got the answer i'd been searching for since a long time ago.
i'd always been running away, wanting to find my own escapade.
i guess i just gotta face up to the bare reality soon.
i'm finally exhausted.
drained out. totally.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
and...
i miss him.
things are moving way too fast and i find it pretty hard to understand or even absorb the whole situation.
it has been a long time since i had such feelings.
i don't know if i should be feeling elated, or scared.
my whole mind is in a huge confusion.
i don't know what to do, what to say, what not to do or what not to say.
.
.
.
.
.
.
everything seems like a fairytale come true.
except that it's one with a little too many obstacles that need to be cleared.
and it ain't easy removing them.
in the past, i used to question myself constantly.
but right now, i think i've got the answer i'd been searching for since a long time ago.
i'd always been running away, wanting to find my own escapade.
i guess i just gotta face up to the bare reality soon.
i'm finally exhausted.
drained out. totally.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
and...
i miss him.